GLASS OF MILK One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to
door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime
left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next
house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the
door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he
looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it so
slowly, and then asked, 'How much do I owe you?' 'You don't owe me
anything,' she replied. 'Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a
kindness.' He said .. 'Then I thank you from the bottom of my heart.'

As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically,
but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give
up and quit...Many year's later that same young woman became critically
ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big
city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr.
Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name
of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately
he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room. Dressed in
his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He
went back to th e consultation room determined to do his best to save
her life. From that day he gave special attention to her case. After a
long struggle, the battle was won.

Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him
for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the
bill was sent to her room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it
would take the rest of her life to pay for it all.
Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of
the bill. She read these words ... 'Paid in full w ith one glass of milk'
(Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly. Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy
heart prayed: 'Thank You God, that Your love has spread broad through
human hearts and hands.' There's a saying which goes something like
this:

Bread cast on the waters comes back to you. The good deed you do today
may benefit you or someone you love at the least expected time. If you
never see the deed again at least you will have made the world a better
place - And, after all, isn't that what life is all about! Now you have
two choices. 1. You can send this page on and spread a positive message.
2. Or ignore it and pretend it never touched your heart -

The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which --
To burn

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The One Flaw In Women
By the time the Lord made woman,
He was into his sixth day of working overtime.
An angel appear ed and said,
"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answer ed , "Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic,
have over 200 movable parts, al l replaceable
and able to run on diet coke and leftovers,
have a lap that can hold four children at one time,
have a kiss that can cure anything from a scrap ed knee to a broken heart
-and she will do everything
with only two hands."

The angel was astound ed at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way!
And that's just on the standard model?
That's too much work for one day.
Wait until tomorrow to finish."

"But I won't, " the Lord protest ed .
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart.
She al ready he al s herself when she is sick
AND can work 18 hour days."

The angel mov ed closer and touch ed the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agre ed ,
"but I have al so made her tough.
You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?", ask ed the angel.

The Lord repli ed ,
"Not only will she be able to think,
she will be able to reason and negotiate."

The angel then notic ed something,
and reaching out, touch ed the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.
I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak,"
the Lord correct ed ,
"that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel ask ed .

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy,
her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love,
her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impress ed .
"You are a genius, Lord.
You thought of everything!
Woman is truly amazing."

And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness,
love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frighten ed friend.
They love uncondition al ly.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a w ed ding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss
can he al a broken heart.
Women come in al l shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, w al k, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ide al s.
They give mor al support to their family and friends.
Women have vit al things to say and everything to give

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE TINY FLAW IN WOMEN,

IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
PLEASE pass this al ong to your women friends and relatives
to remind them just how amazing they are.

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As I've Matured...

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is
stalk them and hope they panic and give in...

I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.


I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just
jackasses.


I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others -
they are more screwed up than you think.

I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.

I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.

I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things.



I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming back.


I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do,
unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural
stupidity.

I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working
in your house, one of your kids did it


I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and
all the less important ones just never go away.
And the real pains in the ass are permanent.

And with that said I'm done !!!!!

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LET THIS BE YOUR NEW BEGINNING… Life's in session. Don't let regrets replace your dreams! Don't look back. Stop waiting. Stop blaming. If you do these things it steals your "today." It stops you in your tracks. It keeps you the victim. If gives your power and energy to another person or to circumstances. You may have been hurt or disappointed in the past. If you allow that to still be your focus then you are allowing that old hurt and disappointment to affect you today too. That means you are a victim not only to them but to yourself as well! Let this be your new beginning. Start over. (I know, I know…but you can do it.) Revive an old dream or get a new one. Put the old stuff to rest. Start looking forward instead of back. This is the perfect time of year to start again. School starts. Fall is in the air. You have a chance to start fresh. Challenge yourself! Surprise those around you. Start to have fun again. Isn't it time? Let this be your new beginning…

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Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; Maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound human policies (don't spend more than you can earn, and adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 -year- old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Tylenol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing

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Mary's Lamb .. Think carefully about what you will be reading. This is a new one for me... Mary! had a little Lamb, His fleece was white as snow. And everywhere that Mary went, The Lamb was sure to go. He followed her to school each day, T'wasn't even in the rule. It made the children laugh and play, To have a Lamb at school. And then the rules all changed one day, Illegal it became; To bring the Lamb of God to school, Or even speak His Name! Every day got worse and worse, And days turned into years. Instead of hearing children laugh, We heard gun shots and tears. What must we do to stop the crime, That's in our schools today? Let's let the Lamb come back to school, And teach our kids to pray! If you agree, please pass this on. It is said that 86% of Canadian, American & British people believe in God. Why don't we just tell the other 14% to be quiet and sit down????

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---------------------------------- DADDY STOP IT HURTS My name is Chris I am three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I cant do a wrong I cant speak at all Or else im locked up All day long. When im awake im all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home When my mommy does come home I'll try and be nice, So maybe ill just get One whipping tonight. I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlies bar I hear him curse My name is called I press myself Against the wall I try to hide From his evil eyes Im so afraid now I'm starting to cry He finds me weeping Calls me ugly words, He says its my fault He suffers at work He slaps and hits me And yells at me more, I finally get free And run to the door Hes already locked it And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken, 'Im sorry!', I scream But its now much to late His face has been twisted Into a unimaginable shape The hurt and the pain Again and again O please God, have mercy! O please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor My name is Chris I am three, Tonight my daddy Murdered me And you can help Sickens me to the soul, And if you read this and don't pass it on I pray for your forgivness Because you would have to be One heartless person To not be affected By this Poem And because U R affected, Do something about it! So all i ask you to do Is pass this on! IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE! PLEASE COPY AND PASTE THIS AND PASS IT ON !!

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DON'T MESS WITH MOM My son came home from school one day, with a smirk upon his face. He decided he was smart enough, to put me in my place. "Guess what I learned in Civics Two, that's taught by Mr. Wright? It's all about the laws today, The 'Children's Bill of Rights.' It says I need not clean my room, don't have to cut my hair No one can tell me what to think, or speak, or what to wear. I have freedom from religion, and regardless what you say, I don't have to bow my head, and I sure don't have to pray. I can wear earrings if I want, and pierce my tongue & nose. I can read & watch just what I like, get tattoos from head to toe. And if you ever spank me, I'll charge you with a crime. I'll back up all my charges, with the marks on my behind. Don't you ever touch me, my body's only for my use, not for your hugs and kisses, that's just more child abuse. Don't preach about your morals, like your Mama did to you. That's nothing more than mind control, And it's illegal too! Mom, I have these children's rights, so you can't influence me, or I'll call Children's Services Division, better known as C.S.D." Mom's Reply and Thoughts Of course my first instinct was to toss him out the door. But the chance to teach him a lesson made me think a little more. I mulled it over carefully, I couldn't let this go. A smile crept upon my face, he's messing with a pro. Next day I took him shopping at the local Goodwill Store.. I told him, "Pick out all you want, there's shirts & pants galore. I've called and checked with C.S.D . who said they didn't care if I bought you K-Mart shoes instead of Nike Airs. I've canceled that appointment to take your driver's test. The C.S.D. is unconcerned so I'll decide what's best." I said "No time to stop and eat, or pick up stuff to munch. And tomorrow you can start to learn to make your own sack lunch. Just save the raging appetite, and wait till dinner time. We're having liver and onions, a favorite dish of mine." He asked "Can I please rent a movie, to watch on my VCR?" "Sorry, but I sold your TV, for new tires on my car. I also rented out your room, you'll take the couch instead. The C.S.D. requires just a roof over your head. Your clothing won't be trendy now, I'll choose what we eat. That allowance that you used to get, will buy me something neat. I'm selling off your jet ski, dirt-bike & roller blades. Check out the 'Parents Bill of Rights', It's in effect today! Hey hot shot, are you crying, Why are you on your knees? Are you asking God to help you out, instead of C.S.D..?" Send to all people that have teenagers or have already raised teenagers, or have children who will soon be teenagers or those who will be parents someday OR ANYONE WHO'D JUST GET A LAUGH. I love this One!!! from a MOM .. (Mean Old Mother)..

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